A Solstice Carol
by King in Yellow
Summary: Hustler Nicholas Ebeneezer Wilde gets the "This Is Your Life" treatment from various spirits - real, rented, and some coming out bottles. The messages are sometimes confused and conflicting, but one thing seems very clear, the Zootopian detective isn't in Kansas any more... Well, he never was. But this underlines the fact. A Who Do You Trust? reminder there's no place like home.


Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from the movie Zootopia are owned by Disney the great and powerful. Any and all registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.

Long before electronic entertainment English families gathered at Christmas, ate, played games, and in a room unevenly warmed by a fireplace, with wind whistling down the chimney and lit with a few flickering candles told ghost stories. You know the most famous. You'll miss the totally obscure reference to another one. Note to foreign readers, there is a Christmas movie, Miracle on 34th Street, with no connection to the musical/movie 42nd Street.

 **Solstice Carol**

Nicholas Ebenezer Wilde pulled the blanket more tightly around himself as he sat on a couch in his cold living room and prepared to eat his bowl of gruel. _"Damn landlord needs to fix the furnace,"_ he told himself. _"What's the point of raking in the credits if I'm freezing my ass off?"_ He took a spoonful of gruel, and shuddered. He hated the stuff. He made a mental note, _"No jalapeños on the pizza at noon so I don't have to eat this bland garbage at night."_ He'd made that mental note fifteen times already, but the Siren call of the spicy peppers always lured him back to the Scylla of heartburn.

Tomorrow would be another Solstice Nick spent alone... Well, not exactly alone. The streets would be filled with suckers drunk on both sorts of holiday cheer – the joy of the day or what they had imbibed at the party welcoming in the New Year. And whether happy or hung-over the marks would be easy prey for tomorrow's scam.

He considered turning on the television, then reminded himself there were fifty-seven channels and nothing on. The airwaves would be filled with the same old Solstice crap that was broadcast every Solstice eve, old movies and news specials on happy retailers who'd cleared their shelves as desperate parents bought anything to appease their children's lust for gifts. But, with nothing else to do, he reached for the remote.

 _A visitor from beyond the gravy_

And suddenly, there arose such a clatter Nick sprang from his bed to... He rose from the couch to yell curses at whatever neighbor was dragging tire chains down the hallway. He did spring back when he threw open the door and found a short, large-eared figure standing in his doorway. The animal looked familiar, but so heavily wrapped in chains Nick could not be certain. "Who are you?"

"Ask me who I was."

"All right, who were you?"

"In life I was your partner, Finnick Marley."

"I didn't even know you were dead."

"Shut up, Nick. I'm here to warn you... Say, you going to ask me in and offer me a chair or leave me standing in this damn hall? It's cold out here."

"Uh, sure. C'mon in."

Nick resumed his place on the couch, and wrapped the blanket around himself again.

"Cold as hell in here too. Forget to pay your heating bill?"

"Landlord's having trouble with the furnace."

"Then I'll make this fast, I got five more animals I need to haunt tonight."

"Why are you renting yourself out as a ghost?"

"Skint again. But ghosts are in demand tonight. I'm here to warn you that your heart is two sizes too small and–"

"My heart is two sizes too small?"

Finnick's ghost checked his notes. "Sorry. Wrong address. I got a cave I'm visiting next. You will be visited by three ghosts and–"

"Three other ghosts, or two besides you?"

The fennec looked again, "Three more. Oh, and you get standard warning number two, mend your ways or you end up with my fate."

"Broke from bad bets, alimony, and child support, so I lose all my dignity and rent myself out as a holiday spirit?"

"The only good holiday spirits come in bottles. I'm taking a cider from your fridge before I go to warn the next bum to straighten up."

 _"This has got to be the worst case of indigestion I've ever had,"_ Nick thought as the Finnick let himself out and the door locked behind him. _"He must have been an undigested bit of chicken, a blot of mustard, a crumb of cheese, but most likely a fragment of jalapeño pizza..."_

 _Spirit of Solstice past_

With his heartburn preventing sleep, Nick turned on the television. The guide showed Miracle on 42nd Street on the Hooch Network. This was hardly surprising. In the week before Solstice Miracle on 42nd Street was guaranteed to be playing on one station or another at any given hour of the day. He usually avoided the film, it had too many memories for him. The first time he had stayed up until midnight to welcome in the New Year. Singing along with his father to 'There's a Sunny Side to Every Situation'.

As the song began in the movie a tenor voice started to sing beside Nick on the couch. Startled, Nick turned to see his father's ghost sitting beside him. His father paused his singing just long enough to tell Nick, "Join in!"

At the end of the song Nick asked, "You're one of the three ghosts who're supposed to visit?"

"Yep. I'm supposed to remind you of the good times we had in Solstices past... I'm sorry there weren't more."

"You mean, because you died?"

"Well, that's part of it. And I felt like we never did enough for you and your sister. I moved your mom here because I thought all things were possible in Zootopia and... Well, life doesn't always work out like you plan. There were years when... I wish I'd given you more. That year, when you wanted a train set, I... Sorry."

"You don't need to be sorry. I'm sorry I was such a rotten son, all greed and a yard wide. You were there for me, that was what mattered. I realized that, later. I'd have been happy with underwear for Solstice if you'd just been alive to give them."

William Wilde grinned, "Good to hear. And on that note, I'm out of here."

"Wait, I admit I miss you, and you take off? What kind of ghost are you?"

"You already know the lesson I was here to give you. It's been great to see you, but I have another appointment. Just remember, there's a sunny side to every situation."

"Even you dying?"

"Sometimes you have to look harder than others. You didn't lose your mother, she did a better job raising you than I would have."

"I ended up a hustler."

"Don't blame her for that."

"I don't."

"Good. She gave you values, whether you use them or not. Oh, one final note. Seriously, Nick, you need to remember to talk with me more often."

"You're dead, remember?"

"It doesn't stop your mother. We talk almost daily. And, while I hate to haunt and run I'm due to dance with her in her dreams. We met at a Solstice party. Someone introduced us. In an act of courage inspired by too much to drink I asked for a dance and lost my heart when I held her in my arms... The rest is history, and you, and your sister."

"You and mom were drunk when you–"

"I didn't say I was drunk. I said I consumed more than usual. And your mother was sober. In our years together I never saw her drunk. So, I had an excuse for daring to ask the most beautiful vixen there for a dance, I was tipsy. She had no excuse for accepting my invitation. It's a wonderful life, Nick. Appreciate it while you have it, and never forget to tell those you love how much they mean to you."

 _Spirit of Solstice present  
_

"Dad!" Nick called, and then realized he was alone in his apartment. _"Antacids, I need antacids,"_ Nick thought. _"Dreaming... I... How long does a dream last?"_ Some say that while a dream may seem to take hours the reality is that it only lasts a few seconds. Nick wasn't sure who said it, or what evidence they had, but Miracle was still in the same spot in the movie he'd been watching when his father appeared. Perhaps he'd dozed off and it had started all over again.

He was about to check the channel guide to see if back-to-back episodes were being shown when he heard a noise at his doorway. "Finnick back to grab another cider," Nick decided and went to the door and opened it.

A startled Duke Weaselton looked up from his effort to pick the lock on the door. "Uh... Dis iz your place?"

"Yes, and you'd–"

"I iz da ghost of Solstice present, and I–"

"You're the ghost of Solstice present?"

"I just said dat."

"They must really be desperate for holiday spirits this year."

"Da only good holiday spirits comes–"

"In a bottle. Heard that one already. Not that I'm trying to get rid of you, but let's get this over with. What's your shtick?"

"We iz gonna visit parties to see da happy animals drinkin' too much an' embarassin' demselves."

"That pretty much covers every party in Zootopia."

"Yeah, pretty much. But da contractual obfuscation iz dat I only needs show ya t'ree and den I moves on to da next stop."

"Is it in a cave?"

"A cave?" the puzzled weasel asked, but he checked his notes, "Nope. Don't even got to go nowhere for first stop, fifth floor."

Nick didn't really know his neighbors. He might nod to them in passing, but they were mostly strangers. Duke and Nick opened the apartment door and walked in. The furnace was off for them as well, but the stove and oven kept things more comfortable as hors d'oeuvres, pizza, and desserts came out of the oven. Guests wore heavy sweaters and seemed to be enjoying themselves. There were some opened bottles on the kitchen counter, but no one seemed inebriated. "Dis iz nots what I had in mind," muttered Duke. "Try again."

Nick wasn't sure how they got there, but they were now outside an expensive, large home. "Helps me force dis window," whispered the weasel.

"Isn't this breaking and entering?"

"Only if we iz caught. An' let us make soitain dat does not happen on dis ghostly visitation."

The wife of Mayor Lionheart had organized a lavish party for important large animals in Zootopia. Invitations to the party were considered a proof of having arrived at the pinnacle of Zootopian society. Leodore looked a little tired, or bored, as he played host. He might rather have popped a cider and watched a game on television, but the house was filled with potential donors for his next election campaign as well as the movers and shakers of the city. Male lions knew not to argue with their wives.

"Before we leave," Nick suggested to Duke, "you should put back the sterling you pocketed."

"Me? I woulds not touch a–"

Nick reached over and took the silver from Duke's pocket.

"How did dat gets in dere?"

Nick started to suggest, "Maybe it–" but they were no longer in the Mayor's home. They stood on the doorstep outside a huge mansion. "This is Big's house," a nervous Nick reminded the weasel.

I just takes ya where I iz supposed to."

A polar bear guarding the entrance ordered, "Go in, Nick."

"But..."

"Solstice Eve. Truce is always in effect."

Duke tried to follow Nick inside, but Raymond lowered a massive arm to block him. "Not you. You stay here."

A smaller bear served as a butler inside the mansion. "Follow me." The Big mansion was designed for animals of all sizes. Nick passed ball rooms where large and short animals danced. He managed only a fast glance into a riotous party going on in a room for smalls. He thought he saw a two of Big's rivals among the throng. Solstice, when peace reigned even among the mobs. All lives were respected and it was a chance to forge new bonds of friendship – the polite way of saying forming new coalitions for the coming year against the enemies you both hated more.

Nick was shown to a room with several nervous animals, awaiting their own audiences with Mr. Big. When his turn came Nick kissed the shrew's ring. "I, uh, heard you were dead."

"Did that stop your father from seeing you tonight?"

"How did you–"

"In my business it is important to know things. I have my animals everywhere. We almost had you a couple times this year. You are a very slippery fish."

"Look, I didn't know the rug– I mean, the animal I bought it from said– I would never have given it if I knew."

"And yet you gave it. I trusted you once, and that was how you repaid me?"

"It was a mistake."

"You were the mistake. For a hustler you could sometimes be stupid, and stupid is a liability I can't afford. But you are safe tonight. You've been shown the lesson, nothing is more important than family. Nothing. It is why the insult to my mother cut me deeply. It will cut you deeply if you aren't careful. You may go."

Nick breathed a sigh of relief and headed for the door. He definitely needed to 'thank' Duke for bringing him here. Tying him to a large rock and tossing him in the river seemed appropriate. Let Big observe a Solstice peace with his enemies if he wished, Nick felt no such obligation. Any chance of committing mayhem was removed when Nick opened the door of Big's mansion to step outside, and found himself again on the couch in front of the television in his apartment.

 _Spirit of Solstice future  
_

Nick yawned. Despite the indigestion it was obvious he was dozing off and suffering nightmares. He was trying to sort out his memories when a very pretty, and very pregnant, rabbit came out to the living room from the kitchen. "Awake? Good. You need to go to the grocery and–"

"Excuse me, do I know you?"

She grinned and patted her stomach, "You sure do. Seriously, Nick, we need to decide on number of children. It's pretty obvious that if we drink out of the same glass without protection I end up pregnant. I'm voting for number three here being the last."

"I have two children?"

"Two and a half..." She patted her stomach, "Maybe two and three-quarters."

"Are you the ghost of Solstice yet to come?"

She leaned over and rubbed noses with him. "Do you want me to be? Do you think I'd deny you anything?" She kissed him, and his heart grew three sizes larger.

Nick decided that, as dreams went, this was a whole lot better than breaking into the Lionheart house with Duke Weaselton. He put his arms around the bunny, hoping this dream didn't end suddenly.

 _Morning light_

Someone was shaking him.

"Nick, wake up!"

He blinked in the harsh light of day, "Wha? Who?"

"Smee."

"Smee?"

"It's me, Judy."

His pregnant wife stood by the bed, shaking his shoulder. "C'mon, Sleepy. Busy day, we need to get moving."

"I... Where was I?"

"Dreaming."

"No, it wasn't a dream... I was a hustler again... Finnick was there, and Duke, and–"

"You're dreaming about Duke?"

"I'm telling you it wasn't a dream, it was realer than that. Big was there."

"You do remember he died a couple years ago?"

"Doesn't matter. Dad was there too... But it was real!... And... I think everyone was trying to tell me, that there's no place like home."

"You didn't know that already?"

"In a good way. Animals in bars don't want to go home. This was more home is... I wasn't dreaming because I couldn't sleep. That jalapeño pizza kept me awake."

"You need to lay off jalapeño pizzas. They make you crazy. Crazier."

"Says the bunny living on porcupine take-out."

"Never make fun of a pregnant wife's cravings. Not if you're thinking about ever having sex again."

"Oh, and you were there too. You were pregnant again."

Like you could forget that?" Judy smiled and patted her stomach. "Although this little bun is almost done and ready to leave the oven."

"The ultra-sound says she'll look like a vixen."

"She's still a bun in a bunny for now."

"You said it was your third."

"This is my second pregnancy, trust me."

"No, in the... In the... You were there and said it was number three. And... Apparently number three was a fast conception too."

"Will be. Couldn't be any faster than this one. I think I was pregnant twelve minutes after we decided to try for number two."

"You said something about getting me fixed."

"And, like I said, make fun of my cravings and I may do it myself on the kitchen table. Now get moving, busy day. Jay waited to open gifts."

"She waited?"

"For her daddy? Sure. We need to take Min home, she fell asleep here last night. Oh, stop at the Bagheeras first. Sam said they needed to buy gifts for his 'sisters'. Hye picked out something for Jay and Min to give Sam."

Nick shook his head to clear the cobwebs. "It seemed real."

"Exactly how much eggnog did you drink last night?"

–The End–


End file.
